Weightloss is Like A Concert

Weightloss is Like a Concert

Last night I had the pleasure of seeing the band Bush live. That crosses off one of my bands that I always wanted to see in High School and never got a chance to. In the hustle and bustle of the show, I had an epiphany.

Weightloss is like a concert...

1. The Beginning

• They let you into the concert. Most of the time for me it's general admission. We run from the door to the closest to the stage we can get and scope out our spots. Quickly we figure out where everyone is going to stand and then we send someone for drinks.
• This is like you diet. You start off all gung ho and ready to see this thing through to the end. You get all your friends to join you, possibly even your husband. The group of you decide how you're going to get it done and then you make plans. Meal plans, workout plans, motivation plans. What have you. The group of you are ready!

2. The Opening Band

• Let's face it – unless you're ::cough:: Brantley Gilbert ::cough:: 99.9% of all opening bands are that for a reason. They aren't that great. However, they serve a purpose. They get you ready to see the main event. You get your feet wet with clapping and singing along. Hopefully they do a cover so that you know at least one of their songs and you can sing along with that and take pictures with your friends
• On you're diet, that first week just plain sucks! You're hungry and grouchy and you're not sure if you're gonna make it after the first few days. All you can do is sit and think of the things you can't have, but after that first week, the hunger pains go away. That first weigh in gets your motivation going and you brag to everyone about how well it's going. You're jazzed for the rest of your journey.

3. The Main Concert

• At this point, you've been keeping your spot near the stage for at least a couple of hours. You've turned your head to the side and are joking with your friends when some douchebag and his girlfriend elbow their way up and promptly get in front of you, blocking your awesome view. If you're short like me, you just talk very loudly, making snide remarks and let them know that you really don't appreciate it. After all, you've been the person holding up your section of gate and really, you got their on time. It's incredibly rude. They're trying to de-rail your enjoyment. Even when the band takes the stage, it still irritates you a bit. Especially when the douchebag leans back into your personal space to get a picture of his girlfriend with the lead singer in the background. Really?
• While you start out and keep on your diet pretty religiously, there's going to be something that's going to trip you up. You'll have a week that's just plain bad. Maybe you had too much sodium and it caused you to retain water. Maybe there were food choices that you had to make that weren't good and it just sorta happened that way. Those unforeseen circumstances are that douchebag and his girlfriend.

4. The Home Stretch

• At this point, people that were with you in the beginning ready to 'rock out' have gotten hot. They think they're about to pass out and their legs, feet, and back hurt. They've rocked as much as they can and they're beginning to drop out. It brings you closer to the stage and the disappointment you were feeling when douchebag and his girlfriend cut in front of you goes away. You're singing along, clapping your hands, taking pictures with your cell phone, gushing to your friend about how HOT the lead singer is, just flat out enjoying yourself. Then the song that EVERYONE knows comes along and you all sing as if you're in a sorority together and we're all having a great time!
• It's the same with what's now become your lifestyle change. Other people have dropped out and moved on. But if you've kept up with it and so have just a few of your friends, you're all congratulating other. It's a sister hood, each of you know just what the other needs to do to lose weight that week. You keep each other on track with your water and calorie check each other now and again. You start talking about the sizes that you've dropped and the pictures that you take now and you realize how much better you look. You're ready for the home stretch.

5. The End

• As you're leaving the concert, you're yelling because you can no longer hear each other. The smile on your face and the memories you've made are amazing. You talk about how you need to grab the band's cd's out of their cases and stick them on your iTunes. You're so excited and happy you made the journey even though that earlier douchebag threatened your good time.
• This is how I hope the end of my weightloss journey is. I'm smiling and the memories I have are amazing. I will be so happy that I finally made it and even happier that I began the journey.

In closing, the concert we went to was freakin' amazing! I hope that when I'm 46, I look as good as Gavin Rossdale does. I'm so happy that I made the memories I did and I wouldn't give anything for them – ever. That's the way I feel about this journey. The road is hard and long, but the memories I'm making I will take with me forever!

I tend to excel at getting my front row's or close to front row's at General Admission concerts because I have my eyes on the prize. I'll do the same with this.

Leaving you with pictures I've gotten of Gavin Rossdale and Brantley Gilbert.

 

Amusement Parks

Four years ago, I took my honeymoon at Disney.  It definitely wasn't the 'happiest place on earth' for me.  It was miserable.  I weighed about 30 more pounds and it hurt to walk, it hurt to stand, and I almost didn't fit into a few rides.  Since then I've been too worried, too embarrassed, to try to do anything like that anymore.

This week though, my friend, April, had free tickets to Holiday World and asked me if I wanted to go with her.  I at first said no because I was very self conscious and frankly scared.  People who don't have a weight problem don't understand.  When you go to a place like this, you worry.  There's a multitude of questions you ask yourself.

• Am I going to be the fattest person at the park?
• Am I going to embarrass myself by huffing and puffing up the hills?
• Will I be able to fit in the rides?
• If I can fit in the rides, will it be comfortable?
• Am I going to look like a beached whale at the water park?
• Will people point and laugh at me when I take my cover up off?

All of these things play in your mind and I don't know that anybody who's lived this life EVER gets over it or doesn't think about it.  We (me) let those thoughts keep us from doing the things that we want most in life.  Our thoughts are the most debilitating and crippling roadblocks in this journey besides self-control. 

I hadn't worn a bathing suit in 10 years and I hadn't been to an amusement park in the 4 years.  I hemmed and hawed about it for most of the week.  I didn't have a bathing suit and I was worried that I wouldn't fit in the rides.

My friends ending up making the decision for me. Out of the goodness of their hearts, they went and bought me a bathing suit and told me to go have fun (I seriously have absolutely the BEST friends in the world!).  I decided to do just that and I am SO glad that I did!

I fit in every ride, even had PLENTY of room after I tightened the seat belts on the roller coasters.  I wore my bathing suit in public and while I did feel a little self conscious about it, that went away  after a few minutes or so.  I walked up and down the hills with no problem and I had a great time!

Today, I do feel like I've been in a car accident, but I think that's because of the wooden coasters that we went on.  I wouldn't change anything at all about yesterday and I am so ready to keep losing weight. This truly is the best thing I've EVER done for myself!!

Addiction....

Addiction to Food?? Really??

This week I've done a lot of soul-searching about this journey I've been on. So far in the first 5 weeks of the year, I've lost almost 13 pounds. The ticker on the side rounds up. I've really lost 12.7 pounds. I've done a lot of wondering about how I let myself get this way. In the past I've had a lot of excuses. The way I grew up, the fact that I was born pre-mature – the list goes on and on.

But...this is the year without excuses. Right? I began to wonder...has my family history played into my weight – just a little bit? Not as an excuse, but as a reason to understand.

My family has a history of addiction, on both sides. My cousin and I talked about this once. We laughed and said we'd rather be addicted to food rather than what the rest of our family is addicted to. Alcohol, hard core drugs, prescription drugs. Now I'm not so sure. I've thought about it a lot. Is it really better to be addicted to food?

In my mind (in the past), I made myself feel better about the food addiction by again making excuses. I told myself that at least I wasn't hurting myself or my family. At least I wasn't spending all my money on drugs. At least I wasn't zoned out of my mind all the time. At least I wasn't so drunk that I couldn't function. Now I realize that I was wrong. Very wrong.

An addiction to food can hurt you. It can cause you die young of a heart attack. It can cause you to be in so much physical pain – because of being overweight – that it can make you take medicine to make yourself feel better. It can cause you so much mental pain that it can also make you take medication to make yourself feel better.

There is no GOOD addiction. They all affect you badly in some way. I'm through making excuses for mine. I'm breaking this addiction. One pound at a time. As I posted on my facebook. I am refusing to let other people's bad decisions, stupidity, and lack of regard for those around them affect me! Last year I would have reached for a pint of ice cream, today I went shopping for nail polish. I will not be derailed because others don't know when to grow up!

- - - - - -

This week, I am going to try something new. Like I did with the coffee a few weeks ago. I'm going to try to make some roasted vegetables in the oven like the anonymous commenter suggested last week. I've never been a huge vegetable eater, but I'm working on it! I'm working very hard on me and I'm starting to like who I am.

Choices - I'm Making The Right Ones!

Little changes are becoming apparent in my day to day life that make me think this lifestyle change may actually be taking root in my brain. I may actually be making SMART decisions when it comes to choices I'm given.

Examples 1 & 2

My husband and I were at Walmart grocery shopping last night. It was a process as we went later than we normally go, it was super crowded, and neither one of us were in the best of moods. We were looking for one more snack for him. Something that he can eat and it not be too caloric. Going up and down the aisles was beginning to wear on us both. He had tried the frozen pineapple that you can get in the frozen section. I believe it's by Dole. It's already in it's own little cup and already cut up into a serving size. I love the strawberries, but he doesn't like the texture of the frozen fruit. So as we were wondering up and down the aisles and my patience was wearing thin, we came to the canned fruit aisle. He grabbed a can of fruit and looked at the back and cursed loudly when he realized it was much more than he wanted to spend calorie wise and then asked me how my frozen fruit was so much less. I told him I figured it was the difference in that the canned fruit is in sugar water and the frozen fruit is just by itself. Deciding to put it back, he started looking at other things in the same aisle. I spotted the apple sauce and asked if he liked it. He said ohhh sweet, in the way normally does (if you know him) and asked me if I liked it. I immediately said no and then the light bulb went off. I said I take that back. In the past I didn't like it, I'm not sure if I do now or not, so I will have to try it again.

That brings me to example number 2. When we were FINALLY done in the boughs of hell that was Walmart on Saturday evening we were both hungry. In fact I think that's why I was so impatient and grouchy. I'm on an eating schedule now. He asked if we had enough calories to eat out, I told him that I KNEW I did. He said he did too. We were right at the Walmart by Zaxby's and I could TASTE that Hot Honey Mustard Chicken Finger in my mouth. I made the suggestion and hubby said we could go there, but he would have to get something small. That's when it hit me. He weighs in on Monday and here I am encouraging him to cheat on a day that is NOT a designated cheat day. I felt like poo on the bottom of my shoe. I told him that he's supported me so much that it's wrong of me not to support him. Instead we went to Subway. Which reminds me, I will DEFINITELY be getting the flatbread there from now on. The bread there is KILLER to the calorie count. Small steps!

Example 3

Last Thursday work ordered Griffs. Griffs is probably my FAVORITE sandwich place here in town. I normally get a wrap from there and I wanted it, badly! But alas my weigh-in day is Friday and I knew that I was heading towards a good weigh-in. I resisted temptation. It was rough, but then when I heard everyone else commiserating on how full they were and how miserable they were, I knew that I had made the right choice. I knew that even more when I weighed on Friday and saw a weight loss of over 2 pounds. However, I was still craving that Griffs. Instead I decided to make my own at home. It ended up being awesome and so good! I'm going to end up having some for lunch this week instead of my frozen meals.

Example 4

Friday night Michael and I went to Mariah's for our cheat meal. I had saved quiet a few calories, so I was looking at a steak on the menu. I looked and what I saw was a 10 ounce. That's what I was going to have – even thought it was a bit bigger than what I wanted. So when the waitress came back to take our order, she asked me if I wanted the entree or the classic. In the past, I would have just said entree, because that's what I saw on the menu and that's what I had my mind set on. Instead, I asked what the difference was and she told me that the classic was a 6 ounce steak. I said give me that one instead. It ended up being just enough food with my side. I wasn't miserable when I was done. I was content.

I'm starting to learn what that means to be content and I'm starting to learn what it means to leave a little bit on your plate. I feel so much better about being content rather than being stuffed. It's not nearly as tiring.

My thought process is changing and I'm finding out things about myself that I never really knew. It's going to be an ongoing mental process my entire life, I think. At least I'm making better choices now though and I am fully thinking things through. It will all come easier once I get to the 6 week mark – or so I've heard. I haven't gotten to the 6 week mark in anything like this since I was 21 years old. My mind is where it should be, I just have to make sure it stays there.

This week, my new adventure is coffee!

I sincerely want to thank all my family, friends, friends of friends, and people I don't know for the support you've shown me so far. I love you all and I truly don't know what I would do without every single one of you. Thank you from the bottom of my heart!